Pretty Little Liar
by thedisquietingmuse
Summary: Bella is a con-artist. She makes her living collecting money from rich and gullable men. But what happens when her latest con is none other than Edward, a handsome and wealthy musician? Will she get his money, or will he get her heart? Title may change.
1. The Bombshell

**A/N: Okay, so here's my newest story, haven't had a computer in a long time, so I should be updating Speak very soon. Meanwhile, check this one out. It should be more of a comedic lighter story than Speak, and I think it's a great idea. Let's see what you make of this ;) **

"Do you, Catherine Evans, take Michael Newton--"

"I do," I intterupted.

"Michael, you may kiss the bride!"

I looked up and into Mike's big blue eyes, round baby face, and golden blonde hair and watched as he leaned in to kiss me. I closed my eyes as his lips pressed softly into mine and left myself have this little moment. It was beautiful.

The sounds of people clapping and chairs scraping could be heard in the distance, as people got out of their seats and clamored inside for the reception.

As people passed by and congratulated me, I turned around and took in the scene before me.

The beautiful white arch I was just married under, the white doves that were released that were still fluttering in the air, my bouquet of white lilies and pink roses--it was like I was dreaming. It was the perfect wedding, and it was mine.

"Hun, are you gonna come inside, or just stare all night?" said Mike, poking me in the shoulder and offering me his hand.

Smiling and letting out a little laugh, I took his hand and followed him inside.

The reception area was even more perfect than outside. White silk cloth lined every table, sparkling silver and the best china set out for everyone, and centerpieces made with pale pink roses, white lilies, and ivy. The best money could buy. Because I wanted it, and because Mike could afford it.

Almost too soon, it was time for our first dance as a couple. Mike gently took my hand and led me out to the dance floor, a slow, incomprehensible song playing away in the background. He laid his hand on the small of my back, and grabbed my hand in his and started to delicately twirl me around the floor. I laid my head on his shoulder, and smiled, thankful for this short amount of happiness I was able to achieve.

That was when I saw her. The beautiful blonde standing by the champagne fountain. She look absolutely stunning in a floor length, strapless, blood red dress, with intricately curled hair and lipstick to match. She was breathtaking. And I knew Michael wouldn't miss her.

I tried to direct him away from her, but it was too late, he had already seen her. I could tell by the way he swallowed dryly, and by the way he loosened his tie and ran his fingers through his hair that he saw her. And he definitely liked what he saw.

"Baby, I'm gonna go get us some drinks, why don't you go talk to my mother?" he mumbled.

"Of course sweetie, hurry back!" I said with a big smile.

I walked up to his mother, Dorris, and made polite conversation with her. From the corner of my eye, I watched as Mike walked up to the fountain and said something to the bombshell standing there. She nodded quickly and stalked off. Mike turned around, drinks in hand, and made his way back to me.

"Here you go baby, I'm going to go to the bathroom really quick, be right back," he whispered in my ear, and pecked me quickly on the cheek.

I smiled and nodded, and continued to chat with my mother-in-law. After ten minutes, I started to worry.

"Um, Dorris, do you think you would like to help me find your son, he seems to have gone MIA," I asked her, letting out a slight giggle.

"Of course Catherine," she replied.

We walked the direction I had seen Mike slip away, and came to a set of doors in the hallway. Looking at both, I chose one and pulled open the door.

There, on the table inside the room was Michael, with the almost naked blonde woman in his lap sucking off his face. Mike's mother gasped beside me, and my eyesight turned red in anger.

"Baby, baby baby baby, this isn't what it looks like!" Mike pleaded with me, as he shoved the blonde off his lap and tried to straighten out what remained of his clothes.

The blonde woman slipped on her dress and fled the room hiding her face.

"Oh, so this is _not _you about to have sex with some skank on our **wedding day**!? This is _not _you, cheating on me with two hours of marriage under your belt!? Because if it's not, then tell me what it is Michael," I screamed.

He stood there staring at me with his mouth open.

"That's what I thought. I think you just set a new record for shortest marriage of all time Mike, you ended this before it even started!" I screamed, tears leaking from my eyes as I ran from the room.

People stared as I fled the dance floor and threw open the front doors. I hailed a cab and ordered the cabby to drive straight back to my apartment.

As I got out and paid the driver, I walked up to the entrance of my builiding. As I entered, wedding dress and all, I saw _her_. The blonde woman from the wedding, standing outside with a cup of coffee in her hands and a short, spiky, black haired girl standing with her.

I approached her slowly, and she turned around and met my eyes.

"So how was it?" she asked.

"Beautiful. Just like all my weddings."

And with that, I linked arms with both of theirs, and we walked up to my room to get my things.

**A/N: Okay, so if you didn't really understand that well, everything will be clarified in the next couple of chapters. Meanwhile, I've got a lot of ideas coming up for this story! And don't worry, Edward shows up very very soon! :D Review please, and everything shall be swell. **


	2. The Millionheir

**A/N: Mmkay, here's chapter 2 guys! Read and Review! **

"How much?" Alice, the tiny little sprite asked, interrupting the serene silence that had encased us ever since we stepped into the car.

"Two-Million," I replied, my tone indicating my reluctance on discussing the subject once again.

"That's it?!" Rosalie hissed from her spot in the back seat.

"It's the best I could do without making him suspicious! Take it or leave it Rose, it's not like you did any work!!! I was the one who had to spend months pretending to like that slimeball!!! I'm the one who has to spend months pretending to like all of these creepers!" I shouted, a bit tired of talking about how much more we _could _have made.

"_Excuse me? _I practically had to have sex with that freak! He was slobbering all over my face right when you walked in on us!"

God bless Rosalie, she knows how to relieve the tension. I couldn't help but laugh at her rude comment about Mike Newton.

"Well, I've been dealing with that for the past 2 months, so you got it easy Rose!" I chuckled.

"Yea, true true, but you _never _even get close to how far I have to go with them! You whiny little virgin!!"

"Hey! I'm _never_, and I repeat, _never_ sleeping with one of our cons! Its disgusting, and fake, and besides, it gives them something to work for," I replied suggestively.

"That's true. But come on Bella! You've gotta give it up sometime!"

I sighed, once again annoyed at the revival of a very frequent conversation. But, was I being selfish if I wanted it to be special? I mean, I know I wasn't a normal girl, I was a con artist for Pete's sake! Have been for 4 years, ever since I ran away when I had just turned 16. But was it so wrong that I wanted what any normal girl would want? Oh well, it doesn't matter, this conversation needs to be over already.

"Not everyone can be a whore like you Rosalie," I smirked at her, desperate to end this conversation.

She scrunched up her face like she had just eaten something sour as Alice laughed in the passenger seat.

"Just keep driving you bitch!" Rose barked at me, and she couldn't help but giggle along with us.

* * *

We were stopped at a gas station just outside of Seattle, Washington in a small town named Forks. Rosalie was out pumping the gas into our inconspicuous '97 Honda Civic with the plump man's credit card who was currently browsing the inside of the gas station. I know, I know, we made more than enough money through all of our cons than to have some crappy little car, but the first rule to the con was: Blend in. If you have a flashy car, people notice you. If people notice you, they're more likely to remember you. And in the business we were in, you _don't_ want to be remembered.

That's why we only ever, if there was no other way, payed in cash. Either that or we used someone else's card, someone else's money--or we used our..._persuasion_ to get it for free.

After Rose had finished filling up our tank, she slipped the man's card in through his conveniently cracked windows so that it landed on his car seat. After forcing Alice out of the passenger's seat and into the back of the car, Rosalie got in and we were off. Current Destination: Seattle.

Another important rule of the con: Don't mess with big cities. The bigger the city, the more recognized our cons(the men) were, and we can't have people remembering us-- me really, for a nasty divorce and cash settlement. No, that just wouldn't do.

Even though Seattle wasn't exactly small, it was a lot smaller than, say Los Angeles or New York. Seattle was as big as we would ever go. And we definitely wanted somewhere big right now. The last place we were in where we had conned Mike Newton was a small town named Windcrest in Texas. Population: 5,105. Mike's parents apparently owned almost all the land that the small town had to offer, and lucky for Michael that made him a millionaire, as a lot of tourists stopped along the way in the little town to take in the "old-timey" feel of it. Wasn't all that great if you ask me. But I suppose that's because the biggest form of entertainment the town had to offer was the cinema, which played movies that came out years ago.

Enough about that, it's old news. Now, we're onto a new con.

As soon as we passed the "Entering Seattle" roadsign, I started to get nervous. You'd think after 4 years of refining my skills that I wouldn't be this way, but I could never shake off the feeling that I would get caught this time. Of course, I never have and I never plan to.

"Can we stay at a _nice_ hotel this time?" Alice asked me. Damn that little pixie for caring so much about scratchy bed sheets and room service.

"Alice, I really don't think we should. I mean, we're already in a much bigger town than we're used to, shouldn't we lay low?"

"I agree with Alice, I'm tired of these shitty motels we stay at, I want some _clean_ sheets and a damn massage for once! Is that too much to ask for?" Rose replied snarkily.

I looked at them both from the corner of my eyes, their beautiful faces turned down into the perfect little pouts, and Alice was even starting the waterworks. Damn, they were good.

"Fine," I huffed, "But no master suites or anything, just a nice, regular room."

"But--" Alice started.

"Deal," said Rosalie, grinning.

As we entered further into downtown Seattle, the girls were trying to decide which Hotel to stay at.

"Is there a Hilton here?"

"Hilton's aren't that great Alice. What about a Four Seasons??"

I rolled my eyes and kept driving down the crowded streets.

All of a sudden, Alice screams. I'm tempted to slam on the breaks but I don't want to draw attention by getting honked at.

"What Alice?! What?" I asked her.

"There. That hotel right there. That's where we're staying."

I looked up to see an old looking building that housed a very modern hotel. Alexis Hotel. Right in the heart of Seattle. It looked really expensive.

"Alice, maybe something a little bit...less? I mean, it looks pretty expensive," I mumbled.

"No that one. We have to stay there. I just have this....feeling," she said excitedly.

I groaned and Rosalie rolled her eyes. Alice thinks she's psychic. She sometimes gets these feelings and follows them with all she's got. But I have to say, they haven't lead her wrong yet.

"Okay, fine, I'm pulling in."

After we pulled into the parking lot and parked, we all got out and head to the lobby of the hotel. Time to work our magic.

We walked in like we owned the place. Like I said, blend in. Fancy hotel? Fancy, snobby people. That's how we had to act. We started off down the long hallway towards the check in desk, and I took in the scenery. Everything was painted in tan or neutral colors, there were beautiful chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, and the artwork on the walls was magnificent. We hit the jackpot with this one.

About 20 feet away from the desk, I turn to Rose and nod. Poor Alice, it's your turn this time. It's always more convincing when you least expect it too. I reach into my purse and grab a little vile filled with water just as Rosalie sticks her heel clad foot out right in front of Alice. Not even looking, Alice goes flying and lands right on her face in the middle of the nice hallway.

"Oh my god! Mary! Are you okay?!" I screamed, as I quickly bent down to 'help' Alice, while covertly dumping the little vile of water near her feet.

Me and Rose were both bent down at this point, trying to console a moaning, crying Alice who was still lying on the ground.

And 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.......bingo. Two men, one dressed in a suit, one dressed in a hotel uniform rush over to where we were making a scene on the lobby floor.

"Oh my goodness, mam, is your friend alright?" the man in the suit asked us.

"I don't know, we were just coming to check in and she slipped! I think there's water on the floor!" Rose exclaimed, her eyes watering.

The employee then tried to help Alice to her feet. As soon as he reached behind her head and touched her neck, she let out an aggrivated moan of pain that almost had me convinced.

"Don't touch her, she might have hurt her neck! Eric, you fool, go and get the first aid kit," the man, or Christopher Banner as it said on his name tag, ordered his employee.

"Yes sir."

"Ladies, I'm terribly sorry, I can assure you that we have our floors thouroghly cleaned _and _dried every night! I don't know how this could have possibly happened!" said Banner.

"Well, _obviously_ you didn't do a good enough job!" Rosalie exclaimed. "We can sue you for this you know! I've got daddy's lawyer on speed dial--"

"Now now, ladies there's no need for talk like that. Why don't you step into my office after we get this lady some help, and we'll see what we can do for you."

* * *

We ended up with a Double Queen Deluxe Room that came with two Queen beds, a mini bar, free internet, and a 32" flat screen for two weeks. Did I mention it was _free? _Room service included.

After we had the bell boy bring our few suitcases up to the room for us, we got to work using the internet so graciously provided to us to research our next con.

"You know, this neck brace is a bitch," Alice said, sitting on the floor going through potential 'suitors' for me.

"Hey, just keep it on when we're around that Banner guy, and you're good. You can take it off right now, we'll close the windows," I said.

"Thank god!" she said, ripping it off.

A few hours passed, and we were still sitting in our nice room trying to come up with a plan for our next con.

"How bout this one?" Rose said.

"Eww, no way, he's like 65 Rose!! If he's not attractive, at least give me someone young!" I said aggravated. We'd been looking through the list of potential wealthy men for hours.

"Fine, but just so you know, he owns like 4 oil companies, he's worth like 4 billion."

"No."

"What about him?" Alice asked. She held up a picture of a nice red-headed man, he looked about 45, and he was sort of handsome.

"He looks okay, what about him?"

"Oh nevermind, he lives with his mother."

"Oh gosh, not again," Rose chuckled.

"Him," I said.

"Who?" I heard two voices say.

"Him. His father's a famous plastic surgeon somewhere in California, and he owns a club that will sell for 3 million dollars!!! His trust fund alone is worth about 10 million!"

"WHO?!"

"Edward Cullen."

**A/N: Okay, so here comes Richward :). It's gonna get heated pretty soon, tell me what you think. I really like this plot, so please review and give me your insight. Thanks! Oh and P.S. everything in this chapter concerning the cities, hotels, and rooms are real and described as best as I could. **


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